Ang as a lasagna.
He wore this costume while filming Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.
Sal is Silas?
What?? This movie is too confusing! * That guy used to be the President.
A whiff of indifference.
Art, Ani--- Sinatra!
During a concert, Ani DiFranco finds that some fans have a pretty narrow definition of what songs pass as art.
(No.) Seen mail, Liam Neeson?
He gives you the answer before you ask the question. Besides, Mr. Neeson prefers the phone for his correspondence.
All Ed at Romney saw was yen, mortadella.
Ed doesn’t go in for out-of-the-box catering at GOP fundraisers.
Gilad, Ali G.
About time you two met, innit?
I. I am a lama. II.
As he sits down to begin his memoirs, The Dalai Lama is struck, uncharacteristically, by writer’s block. He begins running through the Noble Eightfold Path to see if it offers an easy solution, but quickly becomes frustrated. Eventually, he decides to make a list of what, exactly, he wants to communicate in the book. After a promising start this, too, proves to be a dead end.
Tin ma--- Damnit!
After an intense few months (Ted’s disappearance, Brian Eno’s entrance into their lives, Ron’s frustrating job search), Ron and Nora decide they need a vacation. On the first day, they pay a tour guide to take them on a Wizard of Oz Watch. The guide explains the techniques for spotting characters from The Wizard of Oz in the wild. Munchkins prove easy to spot, as do Dorothy...
`A spree! Beer!` (Free beer PSA)
Yenolab remembers the short-lived (but well-loved) series of free beer public service announcements.
Theses, eh, T?
Conversations with Mr. T, overheard: discussing the taxing nature of academia. Worth noting: The vast majority of Mr. T’s conversations overheard by Yenolab researchers are with a Canadian gentleman who is eager to have his opinion validated.
Sad?! I`m Midas!
When everything you touch turns to gold you don’t stay down for long.
Emo stego, get some .. .
…wait, you’re not really a stegosaurus. And you’re not that emo, either. Corgis can be emo too.
Rep. Parsnip pins rapper
Our sickly root vegetable congressperson identifies a donor match in MC Kuddlez, the rapping bunny/bear monstrosity of our collective nightmare, and uses his political influence to strong-arm a transfusion. Really, how else can you explain what’s going on here?
I un-nested ET`s ennui.
Ennui is (well, was) the thing with feathers, right? (You’re welcome.)
--On level? --No.
Soft drinks are a hard sell in the robot market (and even harder to keep on this shelf). *Today’s Yenolab is brought to you by a mysterious and handsome benefactor who wishes to remain anonymous.
No compulsion in the world is stronger than the urge to edit someone else’s...– H. G. Wells (via nevver)
The Y`s sassy, eh, T?
Conversations with Mr. T, overheard: discussing the cheeky attitude of a performer in a Village People cover band.
I saw to it, tio. `Twas I.
Have mercy. (Remorse makes Baby Michelle habla espanol.)
Single Ladies Skeleton Study
Now you gonna learn what it really feels like to miss me. scientificillustration: Don’t know if you’ve seen this already, but I thought it was pretty amusing. By yummei on Deviant Art (http://yuumei.deviantart.com/art/Single-Ladies-Skeleton-Study-258062496)
Dial 1-900-MIXALOT *Special thanks to our #1 fan in Shillington, PA - for the record, he had nothing to do with the image (or lyric) selection here.
Levon nips `SPIN` novel.
He could have just borrowed it from his local library. He was born a pauper to a pawn on Christmas Day when the New York Times said G-d is dead and the war’s begun…
An educated guess.
As a man of letters, I have, in the course of my studies, had occasion to discern that the lemon tree is very pretty. Equally, I very well comprehend that the lemon flower is sweet. I have espied the fruit of the lemon— it too is, indeed, fetching. Ergo, because I am a learned man (and one who is of sound mind, to boot), I can easily deduce that said fruit must also be like that of honey...
Cable . . . I don`t get it.
` Tab + E + caps ` as a NASA space bat
(The Windows keyboard shortcut that summons Cape Canaveral’s finest flying mammals)
Their performance? Meh. No standing ovation here.
No meds, Demon!
When Lucifer comes trying to fill a prescription, the pharmacist needs to put his foot down.
So, bonobos. . .
We need to talk about some of your behavior.
Rot, cod doctor!
Emotions can run high when the marine veterinarian fails to get the job done for your pet.
A rasta at Sara
As he pokes through Sara’s LinkedIn profile, this young fellow finds himself blown away by her media savvy and communcations management skills. Will she freelance for his Irie Social Diary publication? Unfortunately for all of us, Sara’s answer is “no, mon.”
Wed? Eye dew.
Despite the power vested in me, I cannot accept homophones as your vow. Try again, you weasel.
Yeah, he’s really let himself [Van] Gogh.
Prizes Yenolab researchers would like to see...
1. Carnivorous plants. 2. Proust’s In Search of Lost Time. 3. A weasel. 4. Spray-on deodorant. 5. Human hair. 6. Gin. 7. Embarrassing photos of other members of the studio audience. 8. Joie de vivre. 9. Clarinets.
El Dios Mio, I`m so idle!
Now that I’ve slain that toro, I’ve got nothing better to do than mix my articolos singolares y plurales. No estoy mintiendo, los calcetines nos impiden bailar.
Rot a gill, alligator!
(says the surly, shiny capitalist, shaking his fist) Do alligators even have gills? The researchers here at Yenolab say yes, the gators at Union Square most definitely do. And FYI, Tom Otterness killed his dog for art’s sake: http://www.galleristny.com/2011/10/the-dog-killing-woes-of-tom-otterness/ Sick and twisted.
Dog six is God.
The others are just dogs. Nearer My Dog To Thee A Mighty Fortress is Our Dog Lamb of Dog Blessed Be the Dog of Israel Praise and Thanksgiving Be to Dog
Tractor, race car, rot cart
Doesn’t matter what kind of vehicle it is, this guy’s chops are equal opportunity.
Putin` it up!
The only way to celebrate a fraudulent victory.
Mido`s da gem! Egad, so dim!
After the citation fiasco, Ron confesses to Al that he’s thinking of letting Ito go. Al, who has taken quite a shine to Midori (he’s begun calling her ‘Mido’), tries to explain that she is the jewel of the company and that Ron would be a fool to even consider replacing her.
Otitis media? Idem`s it, Ito.
Ron secures Olympic silver medalist and figure skating legend Midori Ito to serve as spokeswoman and legal counsel for his signature sandwich. As a spokeswoman she is exquisite; however, Ron finds her legal writing technique to be sub-par. When denoting previously cited sources she uses “Ibid” when she ought to use “Idem.” Ito apologizes and blames her mistake on an inner...
The taps spat, eh, T?
Conversations with Mr. T, overheard: discussing the time there was a water shortage.
Where yo momma got you!
We’ve got a man AWOL.
---We made sub! ---O, tu, Al. ---L`autobus Edam!!...
Ron pitches Al his new business plan. He explains that, for a nominal fee, he will help people make delicious sandwiches. Al immediately gloms on to the idea and the two begin discussing what, exactly, Al is looking for in a sandwich. Ron asks probing questions and it is soon clear that Al sees sandwiches as a means of eating as much cheese (specifically edam, his favorite) as he possibly can....
Hero tutor, eh?
On Saturday, Ron and Nora eat lunch at Al’s house. Al makes sandwiches that look delicious, but fall to pieces as soon as anyone tries to take a bite. Frustrated, Al exclaims that he’d pay good money for someone to teach him how to make a proper sandwich. Ron, still desperately in search of a new career, gets an idea…
Nursecaps? (Spaces?) Run!
Now is not the time to worry about spelling and grammar.